HOW DO YOU KNOW WHEN IT’S TIME?

One of the most difficult decisions I’ve ever had to make was to have one of my babies put to sleep.  If you’re as much of a cat lover as I am, then you know how painful the thought of losing one of our kids can be.  Because it is so painful and we’re so afraid of making the wrong decision, it’s too easy to just do nothing.   I had a pair of siblings from the time they were kittens until they were almost 19 years old.  Shadow had developed a kidney disorder when she was in her early teens but we were able to slow the decline in her health and weight loss with daily medication.  When Baby began to lose weight and vomit too often, we took her to the vet and she was diagnosed with the same illness.  To our surprise, her health declined rapidly.  She had gone from 10 pounds to less than 6.  We were having to get her hydrated by placing an IV needle under her skin.  The vet wouldn’t say “it’s time to put her down”, he could only offer options, that being one.  Obviously, I thought I had to try everything else first.  I asked him how I would know when it was time and he told me that she would probably stop eating and seclude herself away from everyone.  She would have very little quality of life.    Sounds simple enough – not so simple.  As she continued to lose weight, found a place in the closet to lay, I kept trying to figure out what more I could do.  I was so afraid of overreacting and making that decision too soon – afraid she’d know I killed her.  I finally made an appointment to put her to sleep but I wanted a couple days to say good-bye.  By this point she was struggling to breathe and found an empty shelf in my closet to hide.  She now weighed 4 pounds.  I was hoping that she’d just go in her sleep so I wouldn’t have to betray her.  She didn’t.  In fact, I got home from work and her breaths were so strained and she looked so frail – it broke my heart and it was at that point that I realized that I was keeping her alive for ME, not for her.    I immediately called my vet and they were just closing up but said they’d wait for me and Baby.  My boyfriend Gary, Baby’s daddy, was working and I had to take her alone.  The vet was great under the circumstances and, as painful as it was, I knew I was doing the right thing.  He held my hand and told me that this was the kindest thing I could do for her after the years of love she’d given me. Unfortunately, her sister Shadow rapidly declined over the next few days and she weighed 4.25 pounds. 

Gary was just as attached to them as I was and this time, he went with me to the vet with Shadow.  I wasn’t sure what we were going to do until we got there.  Once again, the vet gave us our options, including hydrating her so she’d feel better for the next couple of weeks.  He warned us though that the IV hydration would be uncomfortable for her.  

Gary was willing to try it but I asked the vet to give us a minute to discuss it.  I simply asked

Gary “Are you doing it for Shadow, or are you doing it for YOU?”

Baby – September 7, 1981 –

July 6,2000

Shadow – September 7, 1981 –

 July 11,2000 

Until we meet again at the

Rainbow Bridge

This post was originally published by www.purrfectworld.com TM